What’s Up With Judging (Follow Up)

Hey friends,

We had a great time Sunday kicking off our What’s Up with That sermon series and playing with a new tool called Mentimeter.  I love that you all got to respond and ask questions live.  I couldn’t get to all of them during the service, so I wanted to follow up with a couple of answers here.

1. Didn’t we invite accountability when we joined the church? Or does it have to be explicit?

Great question!  Sunday we talked about the difference between judgment that condemns and accountability among believers is :

  • Accountability presumes equality
  • Accountability always benefits the person receiving
  • Accountability has to be invited

Yes, I do think we invite accountability when we become a part of a faith community.  For instance, in our baptismal vows we pledge to resist evil, injustice, and oppression in whatever forms they present themselves; and in our membership vows we pledge to uphold the congregation with our prayers, our presence, our gifts, our service, and our witness.  Those are very explicit expectations and it is good to hold one another to those standards in love.

It is fair to hold each other accountable for explicit and widely shared expectations.

For less overt expectations or expectations that are held mainly in a subgroup of the congregation, I think the depth of relationship you have with the person dictates whether on not you need an explicit invitation.

2. How do we find that log without judging ourselves to much?

Another good question.  Some of the answer depends on where the fulcrum is in the question.

If the issue is you have trouble seeing yourself as you really are, then sometimes its helpful to ask others you trust.  Don’t respond to what they say immediately, but write it down and over the course of a week, record times you think this is true and times you think its false.  Try repeating several times.

If the issue is that you are prone to self-criticism or shame try the activity in reverse.  Ask your inner critic what they judge to be “wrong” with you.  Then share that with others you trust and let them provide some balance.

It can take a while to sift out what we need to work on and what we need to accept.

This coming Sunday we are talking about What’s Up with Politics.  They’ll be less Mentimeter, but it will be available at: https://www.menti.com/8af99638  for you to send in your questions.

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